The ten oddest google searches that lead here

The goddess of blogger Google occasionally will bless me with traffic. However, there are some google searches that just make you turn your side to the side and try reading it again, to see if its more parsable that way. I present to you my ten favorite google searches that lead back to my website:

#10
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"baseball bats for prices you wouldn't believe"
to paraphrase bing "Enshoku's weblog, you source for baseball bats for prices you wouldn't believe."

#9
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"articles on how to persuade someone to dump you"
Don't ask me on this one, as that seems a bit random even for my blog.

#8
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"fagbastards exposed"
For everyone reading, I would like to point out I have yet to, nor will I ever put naked pictures of Ted haggard on this blog.

#7
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"iblp spank"
What in the heck? Is this meant to imply that I'm sadistic towards those in bible colleges...Okay maybe a little.

#6
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"my wife is egotistical"
Why would anyone google that, and more importantly, why would google send them my way?

#5
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"would be some of the problems people would have like nobody likes me, i have no friends etc"
Get a cat. Preferably one about to be euthanized.

#4
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"why is it wrong to kill Christians if it will send them to eternal life"
Because that is murder, and murder is bad. I hope to god this guy was just bored and isn't actually contemplating shooting up his local church or something, as that would be very bad.

#3
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"black people are riot prone"
This one had very little to with with me actually, as I think they may have been looking for HJHOP, where bing wrote an article of the same name: Link

#2
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"if you are prayer will stop the black hole won't destroy the earth"
I think this is supposed to read "If you pray, it will stop the black hole from destroying the earth" which is referring to the LHC article I wrote.
[side note: Haha, I win, and we are all still alive]

#1
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"Twilight Princess is satanic"
Oh bugger off. The game may have been a bit lame, but it was far from satanic. Hell, I wouldn't even consider resident evil satanic, and RE is one of the most occult having, demon fighting, nightmare giving games ever.

From baseball bats to euthanized cats,
Gay preachers and sunday school teachers,
Black holes and black wholes,
crazy wives and killing with knives,
and getting a elfish swordsman to dump you.